Okama bin Ramen

En-daka, or the enormously-strong value of nip money shows no sign of relenting. The JAPanese Yen is worth about 10-times more than the Mexican Peso, 100-times more than the Indian Rupee and a whopping 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000-times more than the North-Korean Won! (take that Kim Jong-Un!) The nips should be having a field day with all this money. However, things are not what they seem. While Sony TVs and Walkmen are dime-a-dozen and cost less than rice milk and fish heads in JAPan, abroad the procurement of these desirable consumer electronics require multiple second mortgages. So no one outside of JAPan is buying fancy gadgets like pencil sharpeners with calculators attached to them. This adds fuel to the fire about the demise of the Land of the Sinking Sun. It's over Nips - your money is worthless!

North Korea today succeeded in launching what is an excuse for a flaccid phallus. Their new dear leader was quoted in saying "Our new satay-rite rift off real good!" After the Kwangmyŏngsŏng-3 rocket released its payload into orbit, the satay-rite beeped peaceful messages to citizens of the world. "Beep beep, beep beep! Kim Jong is stone-cold Illin'!"